- A. The Best Love.
- B. Love and Sex.
1. Types of Love. We can talk about two types of love:
- Love-feeling.- It has towards people who are nice to one and we say that like them. This affection is due to have a good thing, as her smile, her beauty, money, football club, his village of birth, etc. After original sin, evil can also attract us, but it would be a bad love.
- Love-charity.- The classic definition of love is this: Love someone who wishes her well. To love is to seek the good of others, such as providing a service. It is a love stronger than the previous because it does not depend on a variable state of mood. Therefore it is possible to love someone even if it turns unfriendly.
2. The love-feeling and love-charity are opposed? Generally complement, for example, it is easy to want good to those who we find it helpful. Only face them when you feed in excess the love-feeling: then is so aware of what pleases others that his heart becomes selfish, and forget the good of others.
3. Can you love someone does not love and stay married? So many people do. Ussually human friendships start with a love-feeling that attract. Then the friendship becomes stronger when the love-charity increase. In marriages there are moments when the feelings fail, disagreements, misunderstandings, and so on. But do not get to the breakdown (divorce) because it remains the loyalty and love-charity fund is still wishes the good of the family. By keeping the effort to seek the good of others (charity), normally recovers love-feeling.
4. How we recognize greater love?
- In first place, love more who wishes a greater good to the other.
- Also there is greater love when you seek a good for others, at the expense of greater effort. ("No one has greater love than one who gives his life for his friends")
- The greater sacrifice is give the own life, and the better gift is heaven. Therefore love us more who get us the heaven offering his life instead. Dying on the Cross.
5. Do love most who gives many whims? Obtaining many whims hurts people making them weak and capricious. So which gives it, doesn't really love, because it damages them. However, he may think it does good for them, and can be a love that is wrong. Also, who gives himself all likes dosesn't loves him well.
6. Are there any obstacles for love? This can be checked on the subject heart. In summary, the major obstacles to love are two:
- Hate.- It is the oppsite of love-charity, because somebody hates others when wishes them bad. The absence of love-feeling it doesn't the same of hate: it´s possible to not like some one, but not wish him damage.
- Selfishness.- The selfish only loves himself. And therfore loves mistakenly, because damages and belittles his heart, that has been made to love everybody.
B. LOVE AND SEX
1. Love and sex go together? Love rarely involves sex. The brothers loves; a mother loves his children; a man loves his company and his friends. Even in a marriage that both love much, don't think about sex usually.
2. Does sex helps to love? The answer is not easy, and needs patience. In first place, sexual pleasures produce liking and thus attraction and desire to repeat. Accordingly, increases the love-feeling towards those who produce the plasure. However, this is not always morally good, or good for true love. In general, there are two situations:
- The individual pursuit of sexual pleasure encourages selfishness and is opposed to love.
- In the shared sexual pleasures, you can use the other person as an object that satisfies one's pleasure. There's a lot of selfishness and less seek for the good of the other, then love is injured. It is also possible to use sex looking for the good of the other, and in this case love improves.
3. When is sex looking for the good of the other? Is not easy to distinguish. Here are two clear cases:
- The love improves when wishing the born of a child. There they find a good to the family: the new born receives the gift of life, his brothers receives a brother to love, and the parents receive the gift of fatherhood - motherhood-. A child is always a great goft that nobody regrets, although there are economic problems or other type.
- Love worse when using sex outside of marriage. There deny the other person of their privacy and their virginity, without giving the gift of maternity and paternity. There is a lot of selfishness and love gets hurt.
4. Sex in the courtship is not seeking the good of both? Get pleasures for both, but these pleasures are not good for them (whims and fancies are not always good). With these acts, lost privacy and dignity, and in return, do not win fatherhood and family; just taste. Therefore, it is a wrong love, only get a taste for large losses.
5. Why is lost dignity? The dignity of man in these areas requires several things:
- The human body should not be used or exchange (with a person today, tomorrow with another). Should only be given to someone when there is a firm commitment in advance, before witnesses (wedding) to love forever.
- Generative faculties of the human person has a high-class mission: bring the world another human being. Use them only for pleasure is wrong in its class.
This loss of dignity are quite clear, and anyone feel abused when he realizes that it is being used either temporarily or as an object that gives pleasure.
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